Leaving the Bench

Whether you would like to admit it or not, sometime in our lives, we all wanted deep down to fit in and be accepted. What you wanted to "fit" into is of your own making. Coming to college was a re-awakening experience for me, helping me to fully bloom into the person who I really WANTED to become. Back in high school, it was all one big fashion parade. Who had the latest gear? Who rolled with the baddest crew? Who went to the last Wallah party? Who was TOO COOL for school? The glitz and glamour was what was exemplified while academics had no say. Now, I was always into having nice things and looking presentable but one thing I could not do was to hide my intelligence. As much as people sucked their teeth at you because you were too 'high and mighty', that you couldn't sit in regular English or math classes (instead took the Honors and AP route) I still knew that deep down, that attending school every day, going to class, and doing homework every night wasn't going to be for nothing. Not necessarily to prove anyone wrong, but to be comfortable with the person I would have to face in the mirror everyday.

Now, college taught me way more than 3 Chem sessions a week or Black Experience with Ramsamy. College taught me that not everyone in your past will matter in your future. I wish someone could've told me that earlier, or even if they did, I probably wouldnt have listened. After being in college for about a year and a half now, I cant see myself looking back twice at some of the people I used to go to high school with. Yea, it's nice to see them every now and then, but some make me feel oblivious to their presence especially when they go on their little spheal "Oh girl, u went to college and got brand new; you too cool for me!"….No honey, I was never brand new, you JUST realized who I am. Likewise, college gave me the opportunity to put me on a real gameboard, to feel real competition. Before college, never had I felt compelled to compete with grades. Now that I get to leave the bench, I'm out on the field pitching hard for those A's! LOL! Now I'm always motivated to do better. When your on the yard, everyone is just like you, just trying to live and work hard.

This is why I get particularly annoyed when certain people enter the playing field of college and they still want to hold onto that rugged 'too cool for school', 'I roll hard on these streets' mentality. As far as I'm concerned, you're here just like me, there's no need to hold on to that cloak. We're all striving for success so there is no one to clown you for it.

Not trying to imply that I'm better than anybody, but I don't have the time to worry about who I have to look better than or the next big thing. I'm all about doing what I have to do to get the most out of my existence. Shouldn't we all? We don't live forever, but when you're gone what will people remember you by outside of your name?

Think about it.
Some people live to be regular…and it's okay to be regular, but others live to be exceptional.
(don't quote me on that, lol because I don't remember where I got that from!)

Until the next!

Hi Hater!

There seems to be a looseness with the word "hate" in today's everyday language. People throw the word around and stretch it out of context. But as always its never right to discuss a topic without a social definition at hand:

UrbanDictionary's Definition of "Hater" :

A person who feels anger and/or jealousy for someone who has succeeded in something they have worked hard for.

A being who speaks badly,and/or takes negative actions in attempt to create problems for a successful person.

The term is more often than not used improperly to title a person who simply does not like something or someone because it’s not what they are into.

There you have it. Personally, I agree with all the definitions described above but I wanted to focus extra attention to the last definition. More times than not, people will express honest opinions about something and then automatically another party will constitute them as haters.

I mean I don't HAVE to like the shoes that you're wearing. LOL.
I'm not trying to take the a'hole route here but I recognize quality and talent, and quite frankly I am the beholder of what I see is beauty. Likewise, if asked my opinion and it happens to be of your distaste, its not hate...sorry!

Don't get it confused though. There are "haters" out there; some more obvious than others. However instead of casting gray clouds on another man's medal, ask them how you can get on their level!

Till the next.

Peashh.

I'm Gonna Need You to Talk to the Hand

Recently, I read up on certain things in reference of women to acts and behavior most contituted towards "ghettoness". I'm not going to bother defining it because that will only spark a whole other discussion in itself. Ghettoness is only a social derivative of what we individually believe.

Nonetheless, there is always this level of hypocrisy and ignorance when it comes to African-Americans looking down on other members of their race deemed to be "ghetto". Not to get it twisted though; if I am in an uncomfortable position where I feel I am surrounded by too much of this G-word, I am QUICK to remove myself from the situation. That is just my way of staying out of trouble.

However, when I see people with these elitist attitudes jesting at the likes of these so-called "ghetto" females, I shake my head. Yes, these behaviors are indeed unfavorable but we must not turn around and see ourselves as "better than them". Because behind all the hype and good laugh you get from looking down on these individuals, this is the growing cause of the divisible line in the Black race.

Oh and shall I touch up on the word, "Hoodrat". This word in my mind is VERY derogatory, and in my opinion a racial slur. The same way one may call a white person a "cracker" or a Mexican a "spic" is indeed the same way you call a Black/African-American person a "Hoodrat". [Should I note, only to be used as an example, so please take no offense :)] Now the only difference with this term is that it is used by African-Americans against other African-Americans. Now, why after so many years of oppression (yeaaa we taking back to slavery!) are we loosely using this term to call a woman (more specifically) a "hoodrat"?

NO BUT SERIOUSLY, who wants to be called a RAT?! When I thought about the context of this word, I erased it from my vocab.

So for all you folks out there who haven't exactly caught the jist of why I titled this post the way I did, let me break it down like this...

If your going to check the actions of other people, please check yourself first. Be careful about the things you say to other people. I myself is guilty of having diarrhea mouth every now and then but I try to come to terms with the consequences of my actions.

Ignorance is bliss guys. If everyone lifts plus one, we all rise together.

♥Olive

Let’s Talk About Sex

No, we won't be talking about sex (sorry guys! LOL) but now that I've got your attention what I will be speaking about is the OPPOSITE SEX. More specifically, what bothers me about the opposite sex and don't worry fellas I'll be sure I include the things that I'm sure annoys you about the ladies.

[DISCLAIMER: THIS IS A LONG ONE! BUT INTERESTING! I PROMISE!]

Nevertheless, I'm sure that both the ladies and the guys have had their complications and altercations when it came to the opposite sex and in this post I'll be getting into the nitty gritty. Oh, and I'm in no way calling anyone out on a subliminal! Ill just make that clear beforehand. Now that is all said and done, let's start with women and their problems with the guys.

1. In a mating perspective, guys will show persistent interest in a girl and possibly even tell her directly that he is "feeling" her. In the process of that or somewhere down the line, the girl may like him as well. THE MOMENT, that the girl seeks to further the relationship…in other words "see what's good", all of a sudden the guy loses interest. Yea yea yea…I've heard the excuses—"I don't want a relationship right now" or "I'm not trying to wife nobody at the moment". Save the sausage. If that was how you felt in the beginning then you shouldn't have relayed such persistent interests like that. And if you were doing it for the booty, then that's a whole different story…

2. Guys will always go off at the mouth about how "girls talk". Well guys talk too! As a matter of fact, guys talk MORE than girls in my perspective. The matter of the talk and the motives are different however. Girls will talk around their girls to get information off of one another; sometimes its harmless gossip, other times it for when females get conniving. Guys talk to boost their egos. You will see a group of guys who aren't even sub-par in looks or personality RATING women.

3. Another troubling factor is what I call "going Hollywood". You will see an "in the cut" guy who is not "in the cut" by choice, otherwise he's unnoticed. Lets not be biased however. The guy can be real cool, friendly, and down-to-earth just because he has no choice but to be cool, friendly, and down to earth. Then all of a sudden, they get an advance ticket to "fame" and then whoooppps, people "get Hollywood" on you. What I mean by this phrase is that all of a sudden you need to jump up and down waving for this person's attention. Sometimes its that 'I'm too high and mighty', 'll greet you when I want to, and respect you when I feel like it attitude. Please if you may, sit down because your Nikes are still leaning over BEFORE and AFTER you got that ticket.

4. This one can actually go both ways. I dislike how guys and girls set these crazy high standards about what they want out of the opposite sex when they don't even exhume such types of characteristics themselves. For example : (names are fictional!)

Bianca: My boo has to have a nice stomach (with the V!!). He has to be tall, dreds, athletic, cultured, God-fearing, with a job!

Now the problem with your list Bianca is that you listed physical characteristics to the T or should I say, to the V. Second problem is that your looking for one that is cultured and God-fearing yet you haven't gone to Church or gotten on your knees to pray since last Christmas. That's NOT going to work….Then alas you want him to have a job…are you overdue on a touchup or….?

Greg: My shawty has to be cute in the face and thick in the waist. She has to be smart and be able to cook.

Now the problem with your list is you want a girl with a nice body, most likely fit. Great. But you haven't been in the gym one day of your life and you have rolls creeping on your neck. Ok, yea she needs to be smart and be able to cook but your lazy.

Since I've touched up on the girls and this post is getting long enough, I might as well get started on the ladies.

1. Girls will always run their mouth about how they don't do "nice guys"…and instead chose a guy who "has never done a damn good thing in his life, not even to his momma" (as quoted by some man on youtube) and expect the guy to change and be "nice" to them, for them. Unfortunately, life doesn't work that way. If you pick a bad apple, then you will get sick. Don't get a hold of a wrong kind of guy (walk over a nice guy to get to the bad guy) and expect it to be all roses afterwards.

2. Females that complain too much. Sometimes there need to be a reset button. When are you ever truly happy and content? If the person is not meeting your needs, you need to begin to check yourself because a person will only provide from what you can bring to the table. You can't come home empty-handedly and expect dinner at your feet if you didn't stock up the refrigerator in the first place. And if you feel that you are in fact doing all you can and there is no type of input on the other end, it's time to pick up your load and keep moving. There are guys who will buy anything and everything for their significant others. Not saying she's a gold-digger but she's not messing with no BROKE! And as soon as that well dries up or the person decides to puts a cork on the lid, you hear the run of the mouth. What are you doing to keep that well running?! LOL!!! And personally if you cared about him and not his money then that shouldn't matter.

3. Girls that exhume that "I'm too Independent and He Can't do Sh*t for me!" attitude. This demeanor disturbs me in the sense that, It's all one big front. There is absolutely nothing wrong with an independent woman. In fact, real men love independent women! But when you start coming off as I'm too good for every man on the face of this earth or front about how you really feel about another person then that's where there is an issue. Sometimes it is true that, yea your "better than him" when it comes to where you are in life, but there ARE good guys out there who do want to get to know you and appreciate the beautiful, independent woman that you are.

Overall, both the guys and the gals have to come to terms to who we really are and create realistic standards about what we want in the opposite sex. These standards MUST reflect who we are as a person and how we come off to others. You are the company that you keep. Always remain humble in all that you do and be honest with yourself and others. This was a long post but it was worthwhile! Hope you enjoyed the read. I don't do this too often! But as we continue to disentangle the questions and annoyances about the opposite sex, lets enjoy the roller coaster ride of life that we live on. Stay blessed.

Olive ♥

In the Interest Time

Its been a long post awaiting and as far as I'm concerned my whole life is scheduled down to plan. Including when and where to eat, sleep, and all those little things in life which you never ever thought you would need to think about.

On another note...there was a little buzz about President Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize for “his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples" according to the Norwegian Nobel Committee. His win came as a shock to many.

I was very proud of hearing of his accomplishment but of course a swarm of negativity came after it. After reading some of the nasty commentary made my people, I kind of shook my head in disgust. In my point of view, Obama has certainly made a mark in society, a symbol of hope to many. So... in the light of all the hate, congratulations Mr. O on a well deserved honor!

He will be donating the 1.4 million dollar cash prize to charity.



So to all dreaming big in life, carry this quote in mind as you continue your daily obligations throughout the week:

"Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because it's only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential. '

-Barack Obama.

Stay positive, I am :)

Living in a Race Conscious Society

Whew. Long time no post! Well lately I've been finding myself in many debates about race and the power structure that exists today. I couldn't help but to realize that our society is so race conscious, in such a complex way that we do not even realize it--not to be confused with ignorance or racism but we have been tailored into a society where our differences are exemplified and our sameness nullified.

Now I'm sitting here in deep thought trying to write this paper about the Black presence in sports and whether sports have been used as a key to Black freedom or a pacifier in the midst of White supremacy. Keep in mind freedom and white supremacy are vague terms left to your own imagination to define.

Anyway, back to the whole idea of race consciousness. When Obama begun to surface in the media as a up-and-coming candidate for the new election it brought about a whole disturbance throughout the world. It was like this person, well...."Black man" was coming in attempting to disrupt not only the political but the social paradigms that have been in place for so long. Even me, laughed at such a prospect in the name of trying to see the reality of things. If you asked me then, I put my money on Hilary Clinton because never could I see them allowing such a "disturbance" to occur. A women, preferably Caucasian would become a presidential candidate before a man of any Black descent would. But as the presidential elections developed I began to realize how conscious of race I actually was and I applauded Obama for such undertakings. 'Whaddaya know'... in the end, he won.

Generally speaking, I find that throughout time African-Americans have always struggled to prove things to the "White man". And Blacks "proved" that indeed a Black man could be president. Okay....so my next thought here is now that they have stated their claim, what are African-Americans doing right now to improve their conditions within their homes, family structures, and communities? I know they say the "whole is better than the sum of its parts" but we must never lose focus on the defined entities of day-to-day life...the kind of things we must return to at the end of the day.

Well I'm jumping left and right when it comes to this race thing, but it just happens that a lot is on my mind. But going back to Point A, I believe that there will always be that unconscious conscious awareness of race if you catch my jist...lol. It doesn't help that they ask for your race on every application you write (forget that whole spheal about 'oh its for statistics'). But there's so many points I could write about race but I'll just save it for the paper I'm SUPPOSED to be writing, which is becoming very taxing. But its just a thought...just a thought. Happy reading :)

Fighting the Wrong War

In the light of that video that hit the Internet recording the chilling death of young Derrion Albert, one of the many products of black-on-black crime...I found a response online made by Nas and I thought it was very well-expressed.

I just wish that African-Americans can wash their hands of the ignorance that plagues and infiltrates the Black mind and the urban communities of this society. We need to uplift one another not continue this legislation of self-population control.

Anyway the response as written by Nas...

Dear Young Warriors fighting the wrong wars! Killing each other is definitely played out. Being hurt from the lost of a love one was never cool.

Dear Young Warriors fighting the wrong war! I know that feeling, that frustration with life and needing to take it out on someone, any one. But....We chose the dumbest things to go the hardest for. I remember seeing deaths over 8 ball jackets, Fila sneakers, and name plate chains. Deaths over "he say, she say"!!!!! "I'm from this block or I'm from that block", or "my moms n pops is f*cked up now the whole world gotta pay"!!!

I remember feeling like I was the hardest "n*gga" breathing. And I couldn't wait to prove it. But let's think. What are we really proving?? And proving what to who?? Everybody knows Chicago breeds the strongest of the strong but I just feel, me, being ya brother from another state feels your pain as if I grew up with you in ya very own household.You have the ability and mindpower to change they way we are looked at. Look who's watching us young warriors, look who's throwing us in jail constantly, look at the ignorance in the world. Look at the racist dogs who love to see us down. Loving to bury us in the ground or in jail where we continue this worthless war on one another.

Young warriors.... We are WASTING more and more time. We gotta get on our jobs and take over the world. Cuz this movie left the theaters years ago, Juice, Menace, Boys n the Hood , Blood n Blood Out, Belly!

When we see each other why do we see hatred? Why were we born in a storm, born soldiers, WARRIORS....and instead of building each other up we are at war with each other.. May the soul of this young person find peace with the almighty. I'm with you young warriors. You're me and I'm you. But trust me! you are fighting the wrong war."